vanessamarie.net

“I could not explain the soul-sick feeling I got underground late at night, when there hadn’t been an R train for forty minutes and the platform was as crowded as if it were rush hour.  I couldn’t explain how cut off I felt, sealed in a pneumatic tube of a commute that spit me out each morning on a gray sidewalk teeming with business suits, and spit me out again at night in peaceful, isolated, hopelessly square far Brooklyn.  I couldn’t explain why I thought another year like the last would ruin me, maybe even ruin my marriage.  I couldn’t explain it because there was no explanation, I guess.”  Julie Powell, Julie and Julia

Julie Powell’s Mother constantly asked her why she was moving to Long Island City from Bay Ridge and why she was taking on the Julie/Julia Project (simultaneously).  While there were some tactical reasons for the move and maybe some for the cook-through/blog, it’s clear that there were basic human emotions… gut feelings that played a part, however difficult they were to put into words.

So once again, I feel like I’m reading my own diary.  I’ve been feeling this pressure for quite some time now, that I can’t really explain too well.  In addition to getting back into the things I want to be doing with my spare time, I feel like I have to move away from here, or I’ll go crazy.  As Adam has pointed out, the actual process of moving won’t be easy or fun, but I don’t mind that as much.  I need for us to try something new and improved.  (Note: we had an incident a few weeks back involving a big hole in our bathroom ceiling.  It may have been the icing on the “I’m ready to move on” cake, which I can describe in detail some other time.)

So, Julie Powell couldn’t explain it and I can’t really explain it either.  And maybe she’s right, there really isn’t an explanation.  Maybe there doesn’t have to be one (though I can go on and on about a shorter commute, closets, and washer dryers, if you refuse to accept a non-explanation, which for the record I now prefer).

Maybe there are just some things we need to do.  So, we do them?

And right now, I need to go to bed.

“I’m a person who takes a subway from the outer boroughs to a lower Manhattan office every morning, who spends her days answering phones and doing copying, who is too disconsolate when she gets back to her apartment at night to do anything but sit on the couch and stare vacantly at reality TV shows until she falls asleep.”  Julie Powell, Julie and Julia

I read the beginning of Julie and Julia this evening while squished between two people on the F train, on my way home to Brooklyn.  I read about the night Julie Powell had a near breakdown on a crowded train, crying tears onto a stranger’s New York Post because she felt so overwhelmed by the mass of people, the stink, her own sweat, and they way her life was going.  I knew the feeling.  I’ve been there.

I’ve also watched myself fall into a bit of a funk where I come home too tired, too “blah” to do anything except eat, watch a few hours of TV, and fall asleep.  Sure, I’ve been doing the gym thing, and I go out with friends, but there have been so many nights spent at home in front of the tube (confession: I’m into hour 2 of tonight’s Biggest Loser episode right now).  Usually, I think about blogging, crocheting, or doing something else creative, but it doesn’t happen.  I feel a little wiped, a little lazy.  Watching TV is for some reason the obvious thing to do after staring at a computer screen all day long…  And then all of the sudden your parents are reminding you that you haven’t blogged since August!

So, yeah, I’ve been there… and sometimes I’m still there.  But it just so happens that it is Autumn in NY.  Shlepping around the city will feel infinitely less harsh.  The garbage won’t smell as bad on Mondays.  The little white pumpkins will show up at the farmer’s market.  I’ll cook harvesty foods.  I’ll take out my yarn and make beautiful things again.

You see, I identify a bit with Julie Powell at the beginning of her story, but that is just one part of it.  I can’t wait to read about all of the other stuff that follows during the insane cooking and blogging project that she undertakes.  I can’t wait for all of the nice things coming my way…

I’ll probably always hate the subway, but otherwise I’m feeling pretty optimistic right now.

Note: This took a painfully long time to get down.  But Biggest Loser was crazy good tonight.  Really. At least I made an attempt, right?

I’m falling asleep right now.  I’m super wiped after a quick trip to Buffalo and back, but very happy.  Holly and Adam’s wedding was really beautiful and it felt so good to be there celebrating with them.  This picture is from their first dance to Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat’s “Lucky.”  I’d never heard the song but was so smitten with it that I downloaded while [my] Adam and I were at the airport waiting for our flight home.

Go ahead, give it a listen…

That was easier than I thought it would be.  The Michael Jackson “Thriller” cassette tape was exactly where I’d hoped it was – squirreled away in my closet, under the shoes and in the blue bin of miscellaneous items.  The only criteria for this bin is that the items inside must have to be related to electronics somehow.   So it’s a jumble of old cell phones, tapes, cds, and wires that I just can’t part with.  And I never could part with this…

When Michael Jackson passed away last week, I immediately thought about all the vacations I took as a child with my parents and brother (namely drives down to Florida).  I thought about the Michael Jackson tape that my brother and I always wanted to play back then, especially the songs “Beat It” and “Billie Jean.”  I’m not sure how old I was, but I declared “Beat It” to be my favorite song.  I was a real trendsetter you see, the album having been out since 1982, two years before I was born. 

Sitting here at the kitchen table, I look at the tape in my hands and I’m sad that the man on the front has died.

But then in my head I see the four of us cruising down I-95 in the old Dodge caravan, as happy as can be.

Tonight marked our second trip to Mandoo Bar on 32nd street.  We first ate there two weekends ago, grabbing a quick lunch before heading to Penn Station. That day there were two women in the front window of the restaurant, making the filling and forming dumplings, but this evening there were trays and trays of ready to go dumplings behind the glass.  I had anticipated taking a really cool “dumpling ladies in action” picture, but was plenty satisfied with the “dozens of dumplings calling my name” shot I did get.

I snapped some pictures of all of our food, despite my growling stomach.  Nothing like some tofu and dumplings to cure the post-workout hunger pangs!

The fried tofu was DELICIOUS.  I hope the capital letters help to convey the fact that this fried tofu was REALLY GOOD and possibly the best fried tofu I’ve ever had.  The sauce on top was what made this dish work so very well.  Tofu, even when fried, can be a little boring sometimes, but not when topped with a sauce like this.

These little guys were the Baby Mandoo – mini pork/veggie filled dumplings.  They were cute and yummy, but I think I prefer the non-baby dumplings:

This is the Seafood Mandoo… my favorite dish of dumplings.  There is just something undeniably tasty about crab stick and shrimp wrapped up in a doughy little shell… for me anyhow…

Since we were in the ‘hood, I suggested/dictated a trip to Red Mango for dessert.  I just love my original flavored Red Mango frozen yogurt.  My favorite topping combo is strawberry and mango, but I decided to try the yogurt chips to experience something new.  I didn’t love them, or having to crunch on them every five seconds, but the yogurt itself was delectable as always.  I may be addicted.

Some men in suits walked in while we were sitting with our yogurt.  I enjoyed watching them all sample the yogurts, get their own, then stand in a little circle eating it.  Especially from the bench, they looked very tall and serious.  They were clearly just out of a business meeting or dinner and I amused myself by coming up with a caption for the sneaky picture I took: “Let’s seal this deal over some fro-yo!”   I know, not that funny.  But I made myself laugh, which is a great thing, don’t you think?

Dinner and dessert were followed by entertainment on the F train.

I like going on dates with Adam.  Although we eat together most nights of the week, a date night usually entails something special.  We may try a new restaurant or visit a new area altogether.  Sometimes we simply revisit one of our favorite places, like Penelope or Franny’s.  We typically splurge and we always go home happy.

Last Friday’s date took us to Soba-ya in the East Village.  Adam had requested Japanese noodles and I delivered.  Or rather, Menupages.com delivered.  As soon as we walked into the place, we knew it was going to be a good one.  The first thing that tipped us off was every single employee in the room calling out a Japanese greeting to us (and every single person that entered the restaurant afterwards).  They all seemed quite happy to be doing it too.  Good vibes.  I only wished I had something better than “hi!” to respond with.  Next time.

Since we were on a date, I decided to indulge in a Sapporo.  Adam ordered a box of sake.

We each picked an appetizer for the both of us to share.  My choice was the Goma Tofu – a chilled sesame tofu.  I don’t think you can really go wrong with anything sesame flavored.  The block of tofu was a little awkward to share (lots of funny chopstick maneuvers going on) but we enjoyed it.

Adam picked the Ika Meshi from the “Delicacies” portion of the menu.  I didn’t realize the section was titled “Delicacies” at the time and I’m now marvelling at how cool that is…. Ah, yes, just a typical Friday night eating delicacies at an authentic Japenese noodle restaurant…

The Ika Meshi is described as “cooked squid stuffed with sticky rice.”  I wasn’t very excited for it but that changed as soon as I laid my eyes upon it.  I guess I didn’t expect it to look like this:

These pretty little squid discs tasted great.  The squid wasn’t as chewy as you might expect and the sticky rice was first rate.  Whoever devised this combination of taste and texture deserves an award.

For my entree, I didn’t order anything too complicated.  I had the Kitsune Udon: fried bean curd, fishcake, spinach, udon, and broth.

Adam had the Nabeyaki Udon, which was a bit more complex.  There was egg, fishcake, shrimp tempura, and chicken, all served in a steaming pot.  Oishii!  (I am told that means delicious).

The noodles were delicious.  The ones you get for a few bucks at Japanese markets are also very good, but these had the texture and taste unique to a fresh pasta or noodle.

However, next time I am going to make sure of two things.   We have to get the soba noodles, since the restaurant is named for its soba and seems to take especial pride in making it.  If you are interested, definitely read the restaurant concept on the website.  I love that they encourage you to slurp since soba should be eaten quickly, before it loses flavor.  The other thing I’d like to do is order from the Cold Soba & Udon dishes – maybe even plain noodles with dipping sauce.  As mentioned before, I’m really all about noodles and don’t think I’d miss the distraction of the broth so much.

This is getting a bit long, no?  And I haven’t even told you about the dessert we ordered.    Because on date night… there is often dessert

Here is the little round bun that was filled with red bean paste:

I liked the bun well enough but let Adam have most of it for two reasons.  #1,  He likes the red bean filling more than I do …

And #2,  I spotted the dessert truck on our way to dinner, and had every intention of getting myself a treat on our way back to the train.

I had the chocolate bread pudding again, with the bacon custard on top.  It was amazing again, except I have to say the bottom half doesn’t resemble bread pudding as much as it does a warm chocolate goo.  Or is it standard for bread pudding to only be bready on top?  Not that I am complaining… the goo was delicious.  The whole evening was delicious..

It’s been almost one month since I’ve last posted.  And there have been so many things I’ve wanted to share…

Here’s a taste of what I almost blogged:

A California Sushi Party

A Trip to City Lights Books

Sushi Heaven

Sleepy Seals of Big Sur

The Coolest Street in San Fran

And that’s just the Cali stuff!

I’ve been a little busy… I’ve done a bit of wedding planning recently but one of my more time consuming activities has been working out. Combined with the 9-5 workday, this often does not leave me much time or energy to do things like blog. It’s been good though – I feel great about being more active and will hopefully make some progress. I’ve enlisted the help of a personal trainer (Trainer Joey) and am feeling pretty damn motivated.

Gotta run but I’ll be back with some post-Cali fun.

Really, I will!

I fell in love with this bench the first time I saw it in a picture.  Of course, what I didn’t realize at the time, was that the bench sits on the edge of a cliff.  You can walk to the bench easily enough, but once you reach it, you are steps away from dropping into the Pacific Ocean.  Wow.

So, while I was happy to see the beloved bench in person, I was also scared.   What if someone slipped, while taking a picture for instance?

No such thing happened, of course, but that didn’t stop me from being afraid of that drop, and all of the others we passed by on US1.  I almost wish I had slept through that drive, but then again, for every view that frightened me, there were 3 that thrilled me with their sheer beauty.

A few years ago, Adam went to California without me (the nerve) and stayed in a yurt at Treebones Resort in Big Sur.  The instant I saw a picture of this little round structure, I was smitten.  I wanted to stay in one of these cute little tent-like domes!  Well, lucky me, my wish was granted 2 weeks ago during our California getaway.  We stayed at Treebones for one night, which ended up being just long enough for me to fall in love with the place.

When we weary travelers arrived, we said hello to our little green yurt.  The colorful blankets and general splendour in the room made me feel very at home.  Though my mom lectures me for wearing too much black, I don’t think she could deny that there are a lot of colors going on in my home!  Anyway, loved the simple yet warm decor in the yurt.

There was a little opening at the top of the yurt, which I think served two purposes.  It brightened the yurt during the day and gave us a window to the stars at night.  And in Big Sur, up there in the mountains, over by the sea, there are a LOT of stars.  And other beautiful sights….

After a relaxing dip in the hot tub, we watched the sun set into the Pacific…  Adam took some lovely pictures.

That night we enjoyed some wine, cheese, and fruit in the Treebones lodge, which I think is actually a very large yurt itself.  There was a fire going and other guests were being served the freshly cooked Treebones dinners they ordered earlier in the evening.  I think it is safe to say we were all very content to be there.  Adam couldn’t have picked a nicer time to ask his brother Jason to be best man at our wedding. 

The next morning, Adam and I woke up fairly early (I blame the time difference because I am usually NOT an early riser).   We headed back to the lodge for breakfast, namely the make-your-own belgian waffles.  And of course, a nice dose of coffee.  Both the waffles and the coffee were delicious and we were happy to be hanging out in the Treebones lodge again.

I should also mentioned that there was a little doggy wandering around the lodge the whole time we were there.  I assummed he lived there and was just making the rounds.  I tried to make friends with him but he wasn’t very interested unless I scratched near his tail.  I still liked him though and he added to the lodge experience.  The people on the Treebones staff were also very likable, more so than the doggy in fact!  I was sad to leave.

I hope to go back to Treebones someday.  It’s so wonderful, I even think it would be worth doing the long, nauseating, scary drive down the coastal US 1 again.

More Cali to come!

Work is coming along quite nicely on my future hangout.  As a reminder, this is the place that used to look like this:

And before that, looked like this:

And before that, I can only assume it was a functioning video store, but I wasn’t here for that.

I’m still hoping they finish the renovation and open up shop before we move away from here (or whatever we happen to do when the time comes).  I have a feeling I’m going to like this place is all… and I’m lazy so the idea of going out without actually going anywhere appeals to me as well

We shall see!